A Year On
I spent my birthday last year in the hospital. Birthdays in yesteryears were usually humdrum, but at least I didn't have to be confined within a room and suffer the effects of medication. I can't remember who paid a visit on my birthday itself, but I remember the deafening silence that assaulted after the visitors left.
Granted with a new lease of life, this year is entirely different. I can go out freely, received birthday wishes from some people whom I did not expect, and there was even a handmade card. Receiving such a card is genuinely rare these days, so kudos to those people who are still willing to go this extra mile to show appreciation to people around. Some people fell short of expectations, but I will take this in stride. You can have expectations, but you should learn to cope with the accompanying disappointment if any - that's a lesson I took years to learn. Thank you to everyone who treats me as someone "special". I might get lost in my own pursuits, but please stay, and I'll run back to you sometime.
I received some unusual compliments that I had never imagined I would hear. I am glad if I manage to exert positive influence on people, but also feel some compliments too much for me to bear. I also thank people for pointing out my shortcomings. Sometimes I think that I am too afraid to stand up for who I am. I am beginning to face it head-on, please give me more time. We can't avert people from passing judgements on us, that's why it is paramount to work on our strengths and shine in other ways, hopefully blinding their vision of our weaknesses. 2019 is going to be a major year of discovery. Have delayed revising my vocabulary bank for far too long, time to get started on that, and watch Groundhog Day soon, probably tomorrow. I am starting to feel guilty for telling people I watch Korean variety shows during my freetime because that too, has stalled. The Youtube part still holds though - vlogs, music videos, performances, skits.
I should have known that life isn't a bed of roses. Maybe I am not good in dealing with people and issues at the workplace yet, but I am mentally prepared for whatever that may come. I still like my team, but there are complexities. I hope we end up as friends, and not just "someone I once worked with", and that any issue will not have a considerable impact on the overall dynamics. I don't foresee myself staying in this company for more than 2 years, but I would not want to see another colleague leave so soon, neither do I want myself to be the one.
A very poignant post thus far. On a more light-hearted note, I will be going to Spain and Portugal in November. Would be my very first time in Europe, further contributing to the aforementioned "2019 is going to be a major year of discovery". I would only be doing 2 countries because I do not want to be too overwhelmed and also want to give these 2 gorgeous countries they attention and time they deserve. Too early to plan the itinerary now, but this shall give me something to look forward to.
Granted with a new lease of life, this year is entirely different. I can go out freely, received birthday wishes from some people whom I did not expect, and there was even a handmade card. Receiving such a card is genuinely rare these days, so kudos to those people who are still willing to go this extra mile to show appreciation to people around. Some people fell short of expectations, but I will take this in stride. You can have expectations, but you should learn to cope with the accompanying disappointment if any - that's a lesson I took years to learn. Thank you to everyone who treats me as someone "special". I might get lost in my own pursuits, but please stay, and I'll run back to you sometime.
I received some unusual compliments that I had never imagined I would hear. I am glad if I manage to exert positive influence on people, but also feel some compliments too much for me to bear. I also thank people for pointing out my shortcomings. Sometimes I think that I am too afraid to stand up for who I am. I am beginning to face it head-on, please give me more time. We can't avert people from passing judgements on us, that's why it is paramount to work on our strengths and shine in other ways, hopefully blinding their vision of our weaknesses. 2019 is going to be a major year of discovery. Have delayed revising my vocabulary bank for far too long, time to get started on that, and watch Groundhog Day soon, probably tomorrow. I am starting to feel guilty for telling people I watch Korean variety shows during my freetime because that too, has stalled. The Youtube part still holds though - vlogs, music videos, performances, skits.
I should have known that life isn't a bed of roses. Maybe I am not good in dealing with people and issues at the workplace yet, but I am mentally prepared for whatever that may come. I still like my team, but there are complexities. I hope we end up as friends, and not just "someone I once worked with", and that any issue will not have a considerable impact on the overall dynamics. I don't foresee myself staying in this company for more than 2 years, but I would not want to see another colleague leave so soon, neither do I want myself to be the one.
A very poignant post thus far. On a more light-hearted note, I will be going to Spain and Portugal in November. Would be my very first time in Europe, further contributing to the aforementioned "2019 is going to be a major year of discovery". I would only be doing 2 countries because I do not want to be too overwhelmed and also want to give these 2 gorgeous countries they attention and time they deserve. Too early to plan the itinerary now, but this shall give me something to look forward to.
Comments
Post a Comment