Ultimate Dumbness

Damn. Damn it. Chemistry was really trying to drive me to my grave. After Paper 3 I told myself that I shall score Paper 2 with flying colours. The most unforgivable thing is to make stupid brainless imbecilic mistakes AGAIN. Sometimes I think things are just predestined. No matter how much I told myself to be extra cautious, I make careless mistakes. I blatantly ignored the hints in the questions, end up with weird answers, then ask myself where the hell went wrong. Of course I will not be able to find the answers to my doubts because everything was wrong wrong wrong from the very start. It's like some force was controlling my brain which in turn controlled my hands to pen down ridiculous and ludicrous answers. It may sound very stupid and unreal but the stupid mistakes time and time again are supporting my hypothesis that things are fated to be and I will not be able to clinch that freaking A no matter how badly I want it.

The train ride home was such an excruciating one. I just wanted to collapse/scream/cry. Luckily no one in public pissed me off and I reached home only with Chemistry bothering me. I can't forgive myself, at least for the time being, but I really want to question divine forces as well. Please may I have some blessings? This is not just any other ordinary exam. This is an exam which will determine my freaking future though things I've learnt may not be applicable in my future career at all. I guess I will break down again if I get a C or below for Chemistry. Luckily no more papers for the time being and I can adjust back to normal mood before the Biology Paper 3. No, I SHALL NOT face the same crappy ordeal for Biology Paper 3.