Vent
Two nights ago, Dexin asked in the whatsapp group how everyone was doing. Kelvin and Weixiang didn't reply (not the first time), until yesterday, when Dexin raised that they were heartless. No biggie about not replying; it wasn't a grave question anyway. But case in point, Weixiang really pisses me off.
He absolutely had no right to hurl vulgarities, even if he meant it in a joking manner. What the hell was he replying to? It can be either in reply to Dexin or me. Let's say it's the former case. Dexin asked the question 2 nights ago, and Weixiang only replied last night. Don't come and bullshit that he didn't check whatsapp at all for 24 hours. I will never buy this cock and bull claim unless he takes a lethal vow. That having said, I believe that he wouldn't have replied last night as well, if Dexin hadn't said they were heartless. Let's say it's the latter case. I stated that he ignored me LAST TIME. It doesn't mean that I give a damn whether he replies this time or not. Then he became all angsty and tried to reason that he was at work. I wonder if he even knows what the situation is. Fucking Weixiang the imbecile airhead. His replies are often so off-tangent, it is an utter pain talking to him. A useless, senseless, illogical, weird, and warped conversation. He should have either replied straight without giving the same old excuse, or continued not replying. (But he had to reply of some sort because Kelvin invited us for an event. This just further proves that he only replied when he HAD TO, not because he didn't see the messages due to work.)
While I have my bad images of others, others can have the same for me too. In this case, he might be all "That Junwei always so sensitive, people don't reply then make a big fuss." But I swear I wasn't looking forward to his bullshit reply so this impression actually is incorrect. But what the hell, don't even bother reasoning with this dumbass, just let his impressions of me stay the way they are, I don't care any more anyway.
I once said that the people in my platoon, or rather, my company, taught me a lot of stuff. Indeed. The latest thing they taught me was: Even if people say things seemingly full of sincerity, those things can still be bullshit. (Disclaimer: Not 100%) "If you really want to do something you’ll find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse." Suppose A says "I will call you." But it didn't happen. Next day, person A says, "Sorry I fell asleep before I could call you." Fine, reason accepted. But if you are person A and you really want to talk to another person or know that the other person has something to tell you, you will call back, and not just leave it and subtly putting an end to the matter. I can tell that some (Note: not all) friendships in the platoon that were thought to last, are fallacies. And I don't care. While I thank those people for teaching me things outside the textbook, I also find it a waste of my time to have known them. True story.
Shit got real when tutorials started kicking in. Some questions are manageable while some seem to be from another realm. Attending lectures not being able to fully understand the alien language the lecturers are saying, and need to read and re-read notes. Mathematics is at a whole new level. BSc, Major in Mathematics, is a degree that is hard to earn, so please feel proud for those who get it. A trend started, a trend of calling one another smart. I don't like people calling me that, because I don't have outstanding achievements like being in USP, and it imperceptibly puts a certain pressure on me. But at the same time, I also don't want people to (genuinely) think I'm dumb. (Who wants it anyway) and I enjoy recognition for things that I have done right. Let's say I have failed to answer many questions posed, but I manage to get the answer to a question that many have difficulty in getting, I will be eager to and feel proud sharing the answer. But life sucks, so moments when you know, people don't ask you, and vice versa. And I think that the calling of one another smart (even if genuine) is getting too regular and a pain in the neck.
And then, when you declare something, it can have the totally opposite effect. Let's say a person jokes too much. You tell the person how you feel. Then that person no longer jokes (or at least he or she says so). Not wanting this extreme end, doesn't mean I/we want the other extreme end. So sometimes, to declare or not to declare what you feel/think, that is the question.
Ending off in a relatively positive note. I believe the closer people in university around me right now, are understanding people, and they will know, sooner or later, that it is quite irritating to keep hearing "So smart." As the mantra goes, "Don't live living up to other people's expectations, live up to your own", I shouldn't give myself unnecessary stress, but at the same time, I need to put in the due efforts and produce results so that I wouldn't be perceived as incompetent either.
He absolutely had no right to hurl vulgarities, even if he meant it in a joking manner. What the hell was he replying to? It can be either in reply to Dexin or me. Let's say it's the former case. Dexin asked the question 2 nights ago, and Weixiang only replied last night. Don't come and bullshit that he didn't check whatsapp at all for 24 hours. I will never buy this cock and bull claim unless he takes a lethal vow. That having said, I believe that he wouldn't have replied last night as well, if Dexin hadn't said they were heartless. Let's say it's the latter case. I stated that he ignored me LAST TIME. It doesn't mean that I give a damn whether he replies this time or not. Then he became all angsty and tried to reason that he was at work. I wonder if he even knows what the situation is. Fucking Weixiang the imbecile airhead. His replies are often so off-tangent, it is an utter pain talking to him. A useless, senseless, illogical, weird, and warped conversation. He should have either replied straight without giving the same old excuse, or continued not replying. (But he had to reply of some sort because Kelvin invited us for an event. This just further proves that he only replied when he HAD TO, not because he didn't see the messages due to work.)
While I have my bad images of others, others can have the same for me too. In this case, he might be all "That Junwei always so sensitive, people don't reply then make a big fuss." But I swear I wasn't looking forward to his bullshit reply so this impression actually is incorrect. But what the hell, don't even bother reasoning with this dumbass, just let his impressions of me stay the way they are, I don't care any more anyway.
I once said that the people in my platoon, or rather, my company, taught me a lot of stuff. Indeed. The latest thing they taught me was: Even if people say things seemingly full of sincerity, those things can still be bullshit. (Disclaimer: Not 100%) "If you really want to do something you’ll find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse." Suppose A says "I will call you." But it didn't happen. Next day, person A says, "Sorry I fell asleep before I could call you." Fine, reason accepted. But if you are person A and you really want to talk to another person or know that the other person has something to tell you, you will call back, and not just leave it and subtly putting an end to the matter. I can tell that some (Note: not all) friendships in the platoon that were thought to last, are fallacies. And I don't care. While I thank those people for teaching me things outside the textbook, I also find it a waste of my time to have known them. True story.
Shit got real when tutorials started kicking in. Some questions are manageable while some seem to be from another realm. Attending lectures not being able to fully understand the alien language the lecturers are saying, and need to read and re-read notes. Mathematics is at a whole new level. BSc, Major in Mathematics, is a degree that is hard to earn, so please feel proud for those who get it. A trend started, a trend of calling one another smart. I don't like people calling me that, because I don't have outstanding achievements like being in USP, and it imperceptibly puts a certain pressure on me. But at the same time, I also don't want people to (genuinely) think I'm dumb. (Who wants it anyway) and I enjoy recognition for things that I have done right. Let's say I have failed to answer many questions posed, but I manage to get the answer to a question that many have difficulty in getting, I will be eager to and feel proud sharing the answer. But life sucks, so moments when you know, people don't ask you, and vice versa. And I think that the calling of one another smart (even if genuine) is getting too regular and a pain in the neck.
And then, when you declare something, it can have the totally opposite effect. Let's say a person jokes too much. You tell the person how you feel. Then that person no longer jokes (or at least he or she says so). Not wanting this extreme end, doesn't mean I/we want the other extreme end. So sometimes, to declare or not to declare what you feel/think, that is the question.
Ending off in a relatively positive note. I believe the closer people in university around me right now, are understanding people, and they will know, sooner or later, that it is quite irritating to keep hearing "So smart." As the mantra goes, "Don't live living up to other people's expectations, live up to your own", I shouldn't give myself unnecessary stress, but at the same time, I need to put in the due efforts and produce results so that I wouldn't be perceived as incompetent either.
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